Scott

Shortly after my return from Europe in 2004 I started working at a retail store the summer before starting college.  I intended on keeping the job part time while going to school, but I ended up working and going to school full time.  It was an exciting summer for me, because my high school dance team coach asked me and a few other girls if we'd like to be on a collegiate dance team.  The team was a little difficult to get used to at first, we were now on the same team as girls that recently graduated from high school teams we had been competing against and everyone had an attitude at first: we were all stuck up girls who thought we were better than everyone else, it was a recipe for disaster.  Eventually we all got along and we ended up going to competitions against dance teams from other colleges, and we even kicked ass against my university's dance team.  Twice.  Life was good.

It was also an exciting summer because I met my next boyfriend, Scott.  Scott lived near Katie, the Assistant Manager at my store.  She talked about him a few times, and he was somewhat dating her roommate.  I finally met him when Katie called him to go to her house, get her tampons, and bring them to work for her.  I'm sure it was awkward for him to deliver her tampons.

Once Scott arrived at the store, I immediately thought he was cute, and a random shyness came over me.  For once in my life I didn't have something to say, it was a miracle.  Katie went to get something to eat, and Scott stayed and talked to me for a while.  He was my age and just got a job at the store just down the hall from us.  When Katie came back she sat down in the back room and ate and talked to Scott while I watched the front of the store.  On Scott's way out, he handed me a piece of paper with his phone number on it and told me to call him.  I smiled, said I would, and put it in my pocket.  While he was walking out of the store I realized I'd probably never have the guts to actually call him, so I quickly wrote down my phone number and ran out after him.

"I'm sorry," I said, "but to be completely honest, I'm never going to call you.  So here's my number if you ever feel like giving me a call."
"Well if you don't want to go out with me some time you can just say so," he replied.
"NO!  It's not that!  I just...won't call you," I said, attempting to laugh and never making eye contact.
"Alright then," he said laughing, "I'll call you."

Part of me didn't think he'd actually call, but he did a few days later and we talked on the phone for a while.  He kept visiting the store and eventually we actually went on a date.  Everything went so well and we made it exclusive, meanwhile Katie's roommate hated me, but I was under the impression that they weren't exclusively dating each other so I didn't feel bad.

Scott was an amazing boyfriend.  Every time we got into an argument it was quickly resolved, except toward the end.  I don't exactly remember what we were fighting about at the end of the relationship, but everything went downhill after we went on a vacation together, which is when we quickly realized we can't spend so much time together without going nuts.  After we got home, things quickly spiraled out of control with our arguments and we broke up.  To this day, that 10 month relationship was the longest I've ever been in.  I feel bad not dedicating more time to explaining our story, but I don't think there's much to explain.  At the time I thought I was in love, but my idea of what love is has changed since then and I wouldn't consider that the case now.

Around the time of our break up I had a lot of other things going on, so it seemed even more devastating since my whole life was changing.  Not only did we break up and I was heartbroken, but I also made the decision to quit the dance team.  Since we were chosen to be on the team based on high school performances, there were no try outs and we didn't have definitive start and end times to a season, so I couldn't finish out the season and decide not to try out again.  I had to actually quit, and I never quit anything before in my life.

That was also a tough decision to make, but practices started to be too much for me.  We were constantly experimenting and trying new leaps and turns, and in one competition the most embarrassing thing happened to me: I blew out my knee and fell in the middle of the performance (I had been dancing with a torn ACL for about four years at that point).  I literally had to crawl off to the side while strangers came and helped me up and walked me to another room to ice my knee.  I still had another performance later that day, so I rested as much as possible, tightened my knee brace, and went out for my second performance.  I was in excruciating pain the entire time and it was the longest two minutes of my life, but I made it through and shortly after I had to quit.  A year later, I finally had surgery to fix the problem.

I made a few changes in my life, it was time to stop being so depressed about the break up with Scott and my dancing life.  I started teaching ballet and tap to kids at my old dance school, and I was even able to perform in the year end recital.  That whole experience taught me patience, a virtue I hadn't yet perfected in my life.  I also had a new dream.  I was going to study abroad in Rome for a month in the summer and it was the best experience of my life.  Since then, I've gone to Italy every year and had the opportunity to travel to over 40 different cities and see a few other countries, too.  I also had a few Italian guys I met and kept in contact with, but only one really stood out, and after meeting him I forgot all about Scott...