OK, so there are tons of creepy guys out there, and I'm aware there's probably an equal amount of creepy girls. I recently (last night) had a horribly creepy situation at a gas station. Before I get to that, let's rewind to a few years ago so you understand why I hate gas stations at night.
Working in retail means I'm at the store until 9PM or later. On this particular night, I was leaving pretty late and stopped to get gas and cigarettes on the way home. I finished getting gas, walked inside to purchase cigarettes, finished the transaction and walked back to my car. I was minding my own business the entire time. On my way back to the car, this man started shouting, "Hey! Hey! Hey!" and I ignored him, just to hear more, "HEY! HEY! HEY!" getting louder and louder. I finally got to my car and he was right behind me. This was too much for me. He said, "Hey, pretty girl, I just want to know your name!" I stood there and waited for him to back off, which he thankfully did. He said, "OK, fine, but I think we should go out some time," and I replied, "I don't think so," and reached for the car door. As I reached for the handle, he took a step forward and I put my hand up and said, "I swear, if you get one inch closer to me I'm going to either scream or put my stiletto where it hurts." This seemed to be effective and he sulked away.
Why would I go out with someone that was persistent to the point of creepy? I'm all about guys that put in a lot of effort, but take a hint. Also, I don't respond to "HEY! HEY! HEY!" a simple, "Excuse me, miss," would have probably gotten a better response from me. Oh, and at another gas station I was once called "sugar tits." And on a totally separate occasion, I saw a man fondling himself at a gas station. I hope these are isolated incidents, but let's speed things up to present day. Or last night.
Once again, I'm on my way home from work and I need gas. I had just started filling up when a car pulled up to the pump behind me, on the other side. I was simply leaning against my car staring at how many gallons were left to go, when I got that weird feeling of being watched. So I looked over at the other car and there were three guys. One was sitting in the back seat and two were walking into the gas station. The one in the back seat was staring at me. I thought it was weird so I resumed staring at how much money I was spending to fill up the tank. Except, I couldn't focus on it because I still felt like he was staring at me. I looked over again and he was staring and smiling. Then, one of the other guys came back to the car, folded his arms in front of him on the hood, rested his chin on his arms, and also stared at me. He never smiled.
Suddenly, my pump clicked, and I thanked God for letting me get the hell out of there. Seriously, what was the deal? I've compiled a list of things guys, or anyone really, can do or avoid to make sure they aren't being creepers.
- Don't stare. Yes, it's nice to know you think we're cute. You can accomplish that with a quick glance and/or smile. If you've been looking for 30 seconds or more, non-stop, you seriously need to reconsider your creeper level and realize this person is probably not interested anymore.
- Don't shout. If you yell, "HEY! HEY! HEY!" I might not even know you're talking to me. It's also pretty rude, and it makes you look like a jerk. Oh, and it's annoying.
- Take a hint. Along with numbers 1 and 2, if someone doesn't respond to your staring or shouting, back off. There's no shame in quitting the pursuit with someone clearly not interested. You actually look more ridiculous when you keep trying.
- Don't underestimate basic compliments. So you've gotten past the staring stage, and you would rather talk to a girl than shout, you can say something simple like, "I think you're really pretty." You don't have to try to get any more specific or creative. Once, this dude walked up to me in a loud bar and said into my ear, "Hey! I like your face!" I didn't want to be totally rude or anything, so I said, "Thanks. Have a good night!" and steered my friends to a different area of the bar.
- If it hasn't worked on someone yet, it probably never will. If your line or strategy does nothing but strike you out, you need to come up with some new material. Simplicity is key, cheesy pick up lines are only out there to be laughed at.
If you still have a problem with being a creeper, then maybe you should just stay at home and watch TV or read or something. Because I'm sick of encountering you...even if I do get a good laugh out of the situation later.
